Isn’t it frustrating when you can't quite describe how you're feeling? Maybe you're scrolling through social media and feel a pang of something – is it jealousy, FOMO, or just boredom? Our emotions can be confusing! Sometimes, there’s a flicker of something you can’t quite name and the struggle to define it begins. At other times, you might struggle to differentiate joy from happiness, shame from guilt. Even if you can define, you might wonder if these feelings are fleeting,...
The beginning of the magical “Atlas of the Heart”
Brené was on a decluttering rampage, tossing things out. She was never a sentimental keeper of things to begin with. But then, BAM! A dusty box tripped her. Inside, it's not just old junk, it’s a time capsule straight back to her childhood. Not a sunshine-and-rainbows kind of childhood, though. This was a land of unspoken emotions, where grown-ups kept their feelings under lock and key.Her parents, both products of difficult upbringings, were like actors in a play. So good...
Navigating Emotions in a Numb World
Brené’s childhood was a crash course in emotions. As a child, she had a piano teacher who used humiliation like a weapon. One day, Brené shared a joke with her friend in the piano class which sparked her teacher’s fury. Her friend was trembling with fear from the teacher’s anger. Knowing that her friend’s family situation was worse than hers, Brené stood for her friend and took the blame for the apparent nuisance in the class. The piano incident wasn't...
Use emotional granularity to unlock your emotional spectrum
Imagine a world where "happy," "sad" and "angry" are your “only” emotional vocabulary. Sure, you get by, but life would feel bland, won’t it? Brené while studying the connection between thoughts, feelings, and actions discovered something fascinating. In a workshop, over 7,000 participants were asked to name their emotions. The average answers? Three measly words – happy, sad and angry – a stark reminder of our emotional vocabulary limitations. What about shame, disappointment, wonder, awe, disgust, embarrassment, despair, contentment, boredom,...
Decoding Your Sadness
Ever curious about what makes us cry? Brené decided to ask their social media followers a simple question: what's your favorite sad movie? The response was overwhelming – over a hundred thousand suggestions poured in, revealing a shared love for films like "Life is Beautiful" and "The Color Purple." And basically every movie that had dog deaths. Upon analyzing the responses, Brené found a wealth of reasons why people loved these tearjerkers. Words like "beautifully devastating," "relatable," and "felt less...
The different faces of sadness
That feeling - so raw, so painful, it seems to seep into your bones - that's anguish. Unlike sadness, a familiar companion in life's lows, anguish is a knotted-up, all-encompassing experience. Brené describes it as a force that "comes for the bones," leaving you physically drained and emotionally numb. Often triggered by shocking or traumatic events, anguish can strike suddenly, leaving you breathless and overwhelmed.Brené recounts a deeply emotional story to illustrate this. Meet Gabriella, a student who witnessed her...
Hope is the key
To counter any bad feeling, we need hope like we need air. It keeps us afloat when we feel like giving in to despair. We might feel trapped, convinced there's no escape from our problems or path to a better future. However, as overly dramatized in movies and books, hope isn't just a magic spell of optimism. . It's a way of thinking, a set of skills that we can develop. Something that can be learned. Kids raised with supportive...
The places we go when life is good
Good vibes only! That's all there is to it, correct? Well, prepare to be surprised! Did you know that joy and happiness are not the same? Another happy bomb at you: When life’s good, we don’t just feel happy or joyous, there’s calm, contentment, gratitude, foreboding joy, relief and tranquility. Got you! Before you start to feel overwhelmed, let’s understand them.Joy is a sudden, intense feeling of deep spiritual connection, pleasure, and appreciation. It's fleeting and often sparked by a...
Emotions Are Confusing
Our exploration of emotions has taken us on a rollercoaster ride – sadness with surprising benefits, happiness not always sunshine and rainbows. We've learned that our feelings are complex and sometimes contradictory, but that's okay! You can want closeness yet push people away, or feel confident at work but crumble around your mom. That’s just how emotions are. Like two sides of a coin existing together - heads and tails. Meaningless without each other.Take vulnerability, for example. Brené's quote says...
Chapter 11
Details coming soon.
Summary
This deep dive into Brené Brown's "Atlas of the Heart" equips you with the tools to navigate your emotional landscape. Remember, emotions are like a compass, messy and paradoxical at times, yet guiding you through life's journey. Embrace the complexities, and you'll unlock a deeper understanding of yourself. So, dive in, explore the confusion, and celebrate the beautiful chaos of being human.
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About the Author
Dr. Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston, where she holds the Huffington Foundation Endowed Chair at the Graduate College of Social Work. She also holds the position of visiting professor in management at the University of Texas at Austin McCombs School of Business.
Brené has spent the past two decades studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy. She is the author of six #1 New York Times bestsellers and is the host of two award-winning podcasts, Unlocking Us and Dare to Lead.
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